2010
I know that smile anywhere
Simcha took me to lunch today. The last time I saw her I was getting ready to leave Seattle. I assured her that I was ok which also assured myself of the same.
Thank you Sim for caring. She gave me a hug and a smile. I know that smile anywhere but I’ve seen another one just like it.
Today I thank Simcha.
2010
Happy Mother’s Day
ach morning I prepare my medication for the day. Metformin, Plavix, Diovan, Coreg, Niaspan, Crestor, Byetta. I make sure I have enough test strips and needle heads for the day. I’m so used to it, I can do it before I’m fully awake.
Its going on three years since my diagnosis. The most difficult thing about having diabetes is the effects it has on my mother. She feels guilty that I have this disease, and she feels completely helpless. For Mother’s Day, I want for her to have one day of not worrying about me. But that’s something I will not be able to give her. I wrote the following entry in September of 2007, it belongs to my mom more than me.
My Three Month Anniversary
25.Sep.07, 11:53 EDT Blog edited on: 01.Nov.07, 03:04 EDT
Finally. It’s been three months since my diagnosis. I’ve had many difficulties in my life, but these past months has been the toughest. My admiration goes out to all the Type 1 kids out there. They have been my inspiration, and every time I feel down, I think of how much more difficult this is for a child.
I’ve been fortunate to have 30 some years of diabetes-free living. I hope to live the next 30 years complication-free.
I want to thank everyone on tudiabetes for their support, and their participation on this wonderful site. I read it often, and for the most part, the people on this site have been my support system. I also want to thank Manny for his hard work on building this place that helped so many people.
So here is my first A1C since I began treatment: 6.5
My A1C at the hospital when I was diagnosed was 9.5. I know I should be happy about 6.5, but but some reason, I didn’t feel happy.
It is a realization that my diabetes is real. There is no misdiagnosis. This is not a temporary situation. I have it. I am a diabetic.
Over the last three months I have been testing 6-8 times every day, injecting insulin, watching my diet, going to the gym, and started yoga. I have kept careful records of every BG on sugarstats.com (thanks Marston). I can tell you that my last my last 30 days BG average was 112, my last 3 month average was 115 and I have given myself at least 150 injections.
I know I have worked harder on this than anything else in my life. I know I should be happy with the results. But I am still disappointed.
Diabetes has taken away something that I will never reclaim. It has taken my innocence. It has replaced it with heart disease, high blood pressure and cholesterol. Even with my BG under control, I still fight these battles every day, and every day the enemy gains a little ground.
Diabetes did do something good for me. It cured me of my ignorance. I was blindly going through life, thinking that I was invincible. It was a harsh reality check and a high price to pay for my ignorance.
It’s amazing that I had to become a diabetic to learn the secret of life. Diabetics know that every day and every action is a struggle to survive and everything has its consequences. We know that pain is a small price to pay for being able to see the next sunrise. You live one day at a time, and in the end, you are thankful for each one.
Mom, don’t worry. I’ll be just fine.
For Mother’s Day, I want to thank all of women who have treated me as a son.
Mom (Pearl), Tammy, Joanne, Simcha, Joyce
